Reflections of Pain

Pain in the heart 

sits  heavy on chest

Making it difficult,

To take my breath.

The mind gets helpless,

my feelings reason less

stuck in a woe,

 I silently wonder

How much of myself

 I still don’t know.

with time gone by ,

hands enough burnt

and  lessons learnt ,

to adjust my sail.

I  no longer wail

 when it pains.

They say  ,

all which arrives us

is from beyond.

 So is this pain.

A gift ,a cleanser

 to clean my soul.

Like a child,

 I sit and watch ,

like a mother she

 Washes and cleans,

Also rants how dirty

Have I made it again?

It hurts when she rubs

rough and  tightly scrubs.

but when she is gone

i can feel my soul

 like a newly born

smiling and  shining .


( This picture is from last summers from a park in Brussels, the reflections in water represents more our inner state, like a clear water reflects better so does our souls and the two swans represents  inner and outer self  )

31 thoughts on “Reflections of Pain

  1. I wish I had your mail address… I suppose you have mine.. Mail me.. then I can send you the mail I sent to all my friends at what is happening here.. You speak of pain.. but I say we are all just numb these days.. I am incensed.. How I wish I were younger and a student today.. I would be at the forefront of the war, the battle… But if I cannot be at the frontline I must then speak up.. somehow..

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It is funny… no one has attacked me so far hahahaha 😀
        But let us wait till the day after.. once they get back from their weekend siestas.. haha.. especially here, where it is terribly polarized.. Mangalore is a nice place for these goons, actually. Much better than Delhi where there might still be a few minds around… Here, we pride ourselves in being “mindless” 😀

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      2. The odd thing is…. they already know.. I have never minced my words before.. before them.. I have never ever compromised with my views. And what has that got to do with being Muslim or not, people will wonder. But the reality is, everything.
        There is something else… this moral policing.. just think about it.. what is the percentage of these goons in any village, town or city??? and yet, a mob of 100 people will terrorize their victims as a thousand people watch helplessly. What if 200 feeble old men from my village and 150 middle aged women turned up at their nasty show? Just what happens then? Why are we so cowed down by so few people? Why is it that we cannot open our mouths and say things that we mean? These lumpen elements do it all the time, so why don’t we, the saner population, do the same just as vociferously.
        Sana, we are used to being the bakras.. we are led to the slaughter because we are at fault – we agree to it. The day the bakra shows teeth and bites the arse of the fellow who is demanding a certificate of our nationalism, that is the day sheep will be considered dangerous animals.. and by George.. they have great teeth too.. just not used very much… Let us see..

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      3. you are right, people pretend to maintain false peace until it start burning our own homes we then come out speaking!though these are 10 goons scaring 10000 people but their backing is strong, our mango man is stressed out with his daily problems , future worries and financial insecurities, he doesnt want to do any thing extra, if I see example of my own town Rampur ,you know what our current MLA is doing there , the literate minds(doctors) who spoke against him ,are behind bars on false charges.So if an educated financially secured man cannot defend or protect himself ,what will the poor weaker people of the city do, they just shut their eyes .

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      4. I didn’t know they are behind bars.. wow.. What a place!!
        You know, your CM was not like that in college. He was a little shy, always kind and reserved. What is probably happening is that his father is pulling the strings in the background. I don’t think he can do much and these goons get away with nonsense with his father’s blessings.

        But that exactly is the problem. The middle class never gets involved. They want to be comfortable all the while. But these injustices which happen also deter good people from coming forward. It is time that we all gave up on our cowardice simultaneously. When that happens it will truly become a peaceful revolution – one in which words will make our oppressors bleed, not swords and bullets; when enlightenment shall subdue the goons and turn them into laughing-stocks. Almost like that old Sahir Ludhianvi piece – woh subah kabhi to aayegi… 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Yes Power is a bad friend and enemy to have 🙂 very few use it judiciously, I think he is more an acting CM , actual CM is still his father, I dont know about current situation of those doctor brothers who fought elections against our current MLA may be out on bail, but what ever happened then was really bad.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. This was so incredibly reflective and thought provoking. Something that I’ve been pondering upon for a while, looking for definite answer or at least something that would tell me “It’s all worth it”.. This was beautifully penned Sana. Thanks for sharing this piece! ❤ 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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