11 year old me: Abba , when I am praying or Reading Quran my mind always wanders off but it doesn’t happen when I watch tv or read another book which means I am only reading from my tongue but my heart and mind is not in there. I am so upset at myself.
Abba : (laughs firsts) I am glad you noticed it , please keep trying to focus and it will come inshallah .
me: I feel bad that my prayers will not be accepted .
Abba: Look there is always a positive way to look at things . First of all you have realized it and you already know what should you do about it. Even though you feel the prayers are not good enough there is still a part of your body ( your tongue) which is still busy in ibaadah of Allah swt, things are not as bad as we think they are. You keep trying to focus and soon you will pray with full focus and attention.That’s how we all learn and practice.
The above conversation is at least 20 years old between a 10 or 11 year old me and my paternal grandfather . It is one of the many wonderful memorable conversations I had with him which have shaped the person I am. It was the first thing that played in my mind yesterday after talking to a friend who refuses to see the positive side of life and not being optimistic for the days when things will be better. She told me I am not as positive person as you are which kept me thinking for long , what could be the reason for this difference in positivism where she clearly is lacking. Is it part of personality? Is it learnt by self with a conscious effort ? or is it constantly fed by our surroundings and people around us in our formative years .
I think all three reasons are valid and the most important one is the last one. The people around us, our parents our family , our environment,if they are positive or not. A child picks up the first vibes and outlook to see life from his surroundings. Is my life or any other person’s life different from each other in terms of daily struggles ? We are all in our bubble of life, struggling to survive and to be. We all have our share of problems and griefs, there might be difference in level and gravity of problems but we all have our share so why is it that some people could bounce back after a setback or problem while others cannot ? where is that subtle difference ? that difference might be coming with the positive attitude in life. I think it is very important to create a positive environment around us for ourselves , to preserve our sanity and imbibe the positive thinking in our children.