Sense and Sensitivity


I have often heard from people that I am too sensitive, and I agree I keep sensing sensitivity and sensitive people around me through my inbuilt radar always on.

The tones of people keep varying, from an empathetic response of “O Dear, you are so sensitive” to being snapped at with “OMG, you are too sensitive! ” as if sensitivity was a crime I committed then.  I kept wondering why our levels of sensitivity vary so much based on different subjects. I might be sensitive on one subject while another can be sensitive to something else or same thing, but our levels would differ.

What people fail to see behind the façade of sensitivity are layers of hurt, layers of shame, layers of guilt, layers of internal battles, self-doubts, and negative self-talks accumulated over the years we spent on this planet earth. Everyone’s structures and layering are unique so are their sensitivities. If I must put life in two words, I will say it is a series of hurting and healing. There is much beneath the surface of a person who gets triggered at seemingly harmless jokes which everybody seems to enjoy unanimously or at minor remarks which nobody else seems to mind. After years of battling hurt, putting up with pain, people can’t take it anymore and break at a slight hint of something closer to their fears and pain. Remember our mothers when they keep mentioning that they will not tolerate this behaviour from now on, chiding at things that seem trivial to us and we couldn’t relate much. They have had their share of pain and fatigue, their cups brimming and outpouring then.

Before we judge people for their sensitivity and classify their reactions into different boxes of our disapproval:

 “It’s not justified. “

“This is too much! “

“You are overreacting! “

“Creating a hype! “

“Dramatizing things! “

We need to pause and think: It is as big as hurtful as shameful as they have mentioned it, exactly how it exists in their minds in their internal worlds.

Respecting each other’s inner worlds can help us better understand, improve our communication and relationships.

A note to self!