Numbness

 

Numbness that appeared

In a way so weird.

A pause to my flow,

A disconnection

 within my process.

A disorientation of

an oriented ME.

———————— NUMBNESS———————–

This feeling of unfeelingness,

Like carrying a load

That you don’t feel

but you are aware.

A pain that isn’t hurting.

A feeling that ME is far,

Distant and somewhere

underneath this glass

blanket of numbness.

————————NUMBNESS———————–

 

While I wonder

 if it’s a loss or a gain?

A grief shifts somewhere,

Wriggling through

a smile and tears.

I wonder again if it’s

Calmness or Indifference?

 

————————NUMBNESS———————–

 

Silences are needed

and unwanted too.

Noise is craved

and overwhelming too.

 

————————NUMBNESS———————–

 

Until I find comfort

 in this discomfort.

Rest in this unrest,

Calm in my chaos,

Knowing in

this unknowingness,

An Oldness of this newness.

Familiarity in this strange-ness

I wait to be home again.

————————NUMBNESS———————–

 

Show quoted text

Release

 A strange month is February, of winds and rains

 Of colds and hurts, aches and pains.

The old wounds revisiting the new you

You thought it was over, Don’t you?

What’s different this time though

Are deep secrets for you to know,

They aren’t only for disclosure,

They are present for a closure.

 

All this while, laced with guilt and pain,

 You’re reaching out to them, was in vain.

All what was ever returned

was more hurt, guilt and shame.

Guilt of hurting them

Guilt of causing them pain.

A persistent behaviour

unjustified and disdain.

 

But this time it was different.

For the first time,

You didn’t hear a hurt person,

You didn’t see a hurt person,

the veil was lifted

in the darkness of night.

In the shade of light,

 You saw a narcissist

dwelling in their

self- righteousness.

 

You weren’t reaching

 for helping them out

You weren’t trying to fix them

You were reaching out to the connection,

to the source of your wound.

Wound that hurts

Wound that bleeds.

Wound that they caused in you

And made you believe otherwise.

Your mind only recognizes

 connection and its source,

feels safe in the familiarity of it

however troubling that might be.

 

Release that guilt

Release that pain

Break that chain

 that binds you

 to your source of wound.

 

Healing is really to see the light at the end of the tunnel, when the events just remain events and memories without having any negative emotion or control over you.

When you break free from the prison of your own mind, of your own negative voices, of the intangible clutches of people who control you, manipulate you or hurt you through their words or actions.

Time to take your power back.

May Allah the Sha’afi heal the wounds of the heart and the soul and illuminate their darkness with His divine light. Ameen

Colours

Grateful

I often wonder if
Colours exist in real
Or is it something
that eyes conceal
Of the Universal light.

With its mystical part,
a reflection starts.
eyes and brain
process , ascertain.
What we truly
witness then
Is a magic, a joy
We call it colours.

Have you wondered if we all could see a different colour for the same object?
We would end up fighting, arguing and siding up with those who see what we see!
We are always validating our perceptions, our realities with others. We side and get along with people who match our energies , our thoughts and perceptions just like the colors we see. On the other hand if we couldn’t see any color , the world would be a boring colourless place , Isn’t it?
I am so grateful for all the colours. What are you grateful for today?

P.S: Can you tell my favorite colour these days? 💜🟣☔

#gratitudepost #talkwithsana # amwriting #indianwomenwriters #writersofig#igwriters#poets#poetsofinstagram#womenwhoread #womenwhowrite #womenwhothink#womenwhospeak #gratitude#fromadaydreamersdiary

Let it rain inside of you

Let it rain
inside of you!
The water of life
Gushing through
The dried veins,
Rushing to an
awaiting heart.
To quench
Its thirst,
wash away
Its dust ,
so your soul
shines through
Like a succulent’s
Shiny leaves .
And then bloom
Your inner lilies
and lavender
that heals.

Life’s Sunset Song

Walking into the fields,
watching the sunset
Running into the wildness,
silences  are where met .

From the depth of soul
A  joy  emerges
on the  surface of heart.
Perfectly merges
With the stillness of art,

To speak is to break
the  moment’s stillness .
Experience ,  Inhale,
Breathe , Witness
Life’s sunset song.

Say Yes!

Say Yes to Life!

Say Yes to positive affirmations.

Say Yes to new beginnings.

Say Yes to gratitude in life.

Say Yes to the compliments you receive with humility.

Say Yes to your inner self.

Say Yes to self care.

Say Yes to your Soul.

Say Yes to peace in life.

Say yes to the Yes .

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Book Review: Breathe by Tumkeen

It’s a collection of Beautiful soulful poems and reflections by the author during covid lockdown period. Each and every poem is so poignant, Well written, relatable and asking you to pause and reflect upon it and your life. The writer takes you along in her journey of thoughts , introspections, spiritual evaluations, emotions and learnings. This is definitely a book to be digested poem by poem, line by line.
It was hard for me to choose one for my posts, but this poem ‘Keep’ is close to my heart, keeps me going.
I absolutely recommend this book !

Breathe by Tumkeen

Book Review and Poem Recital

Masked Reality

Is it really a mask
we are wearing ?
or is it a mask off to
the invisible masks
we wore every day .
No longer can we hide ,
behind those
fake smiles wide
across our plastic faces .
Hiding pains,
Anxieties , pasts
and Emotions.
Do you feel relieved ?
Or are you anxious?
That now people
do see you !
Looking directly
in your eyes.
Where your
soul resides.
Isn’t it relieving
being yourself ?
Or it makes
you feel nervous?
You think
You are invisible
Behind these
cloth masks.
The masks
In reality though
have fallen
My friends.

Masked Reality!

To all the women out there!

Somebody remarked
You are short !
Another told me
Look at your hands,
They ain’t pretty.
Someone pointed
my feet were silly.
Few told me
I might be cute
But I ain’t pretty.
Some assured me
I can look good
Just that I
Need to weigh
A little less.
From 20s to 30
I kept stressing
How I looked
What I ate
Self-conscious
Self Doubting
Hardly happy
Or Carefree.
Whatever I do
I was never
good enough.

And then 30s struck
With a big blow,
All the stress
Self Doubts
Had transformed
Into disorders of
Autoimmune.
Here I was sitting
Looking back
at that pretty girl
in her 20s
Wishing back
that body ,
hair and skin
Which I never
really liked or
appreciated then.

Last 5 years
have been
Self reckoning
Self caring
Self learning
Transformational
Healing
Forgiving
Appreciating
Gratifying
Learning
Unlearning
Relearning
On my
Self- journey .

Being Happy
With the woman
I am becoming.
Grateful for
Every thing
Little and big.
Feeling Beautiful
And meaningful.
Inside and outside.

Don’t wait for your 30s or 40s
to love yourself
and outgrow your insecurities.
Discard them now,
live truly and enjoy your life !

Soul’s Joy

Soul’s Joy

Look at the
soul’s joy.
The water,
When she sees.
Desiring to coalesce
And flowing  faraway .
From the altitudes
of mountains
And the depths
of seas,
Determined to
soar she is.
Prior to, As if
aware she is,
Of  these
pathways.
Her happiness ,
Similar to
the  person
hopelessly lost
and wandering .
On  finding himself
back in his alley.

Tried my hands in Hindi/Urdu with transliteration:

khushi dekhiye Rooh ki
paani ko dekhkar
ghul jana chahti hai
Beh jana chahti hai
Kahi door chale
jana chahti hai .
Pahado ki unchaiyyon se
Samundron ki gehraiyon se
Parwaaz karna chahti hai.
Pehchaanti ho jaise
In raasto ko Pehle se.
Khushi ka alam aisa
Jaise  na ummeed koi
guma hua  insaan
Bhatakte huye
apne hi gali
mei aa gya ho .

Picture and text is mine,
Subject to copyright ©️

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