A strange month is February, of winds and rains

 Of colds and hurts, aches and pains.

The old wounds revisiting the new you

You thought it was over, Don’t you?

What’s different this time though

Are deep secrets for you to know,

They aren’t only for disclosure,

They are present for a closure.


All this while, laced with guilt and pain,

 You’re reaching out to them, was in vain.

All what was ever returned

was more hurt, guilt and shame.

Guilt of hurting them

Guilt of causing them pain.

A persistent behaviour

unjustified and disdain.


But this time it was different.

For the first time,

You didn’t hear a hurt person,

You didn’t see a hurt person,

the veil was lifted

in the darkness of night.

In the shade of light,

 You saw a narcissist

dwelling in their

self- righteousness.


You weren’t reaching

 for helping them out

You weren’t trying to fix them

You were reaching out to the connection,

to the source of your wound.

Wound that hurts

Wound that bleeds.

Wound that they caused in you

And made you believe otherwise.

Your mind only recognizes

 connection and its source,

feels safe in the familiarity of it

however troubling that might be.


Release that guilt

Release that pain

Break that chain

 that binds you

 to your source of wound.


Healing is really to see the light at the end of the tunnel, when the events just remain events and memories without having any negative emotion or control over you.

When you break free from the prison of your own mind, of your own negative voices, of the intangible clutches of people who control you, manipulate you or hurt you through their words or actions.

Time to take your power back.

May Allah the Sha’afi heal the wounds of the heart and the soul and illuminate their darkness with His divine light. Ameen

Sense and Sensitivity


I have often heard from people that I am too sensitive, and I agree I keep sensing sensitivity and sensitive people around me through my inbuilt radar always on.

The tones of people keep varying, from an empathetic response of “O Dear, you are so sensitive” to being snapped at with “OMG, you are too sensitive! ” as if sensitivity was a crime I committed then.  I kept wondering why our levels of sensitivity vary so much based on different subjects. I might be sensitive on one subject while another can be sensitive to something else or same thing, but our levels would differ.

What people fail to see behind the façade of sensitivity are layers of hurt, layers of shame, layers of guilt, layers of internal battles, self-doubts, and negative self-talks accumulated over the years we spent on this planet earth. Everyone’s structures and layering are unique so are their sensitivities. If I must put life in two words, I will say it is a series of hurting and healing. There is much beneath the surface of a person who gets triggered at seemingly harmless jokes which everybody seems to enjoy unanimously or at minor remarks which nobody else seems to mind. After years of battling hurt, putting up with pain, people can’t take it anymore and break at a slight hint of something closer to their fears and pain. Remember our mothers when they keep mentioning that they will not tolerate this behaviour from now on, chiding at things that seem trivial to us and we couldn’t relate much. They have had their share of pain and fatigue, their cups brimming and outpouring then.

Before we judge people for their sensitivity and classify their reactions into different boxes of our disapproval:

 “It’s not justified. “

“This is too much! “

“You are overreacting! “

“Creating a hype! “

“Dramatizing things! “

We need to pause and think: It is as big as hurtful as shameful as they have mentioned it, exactly how it exists in their minds in their internal worlds.

Respecting each other’s inner worlds can help us better understand, improve our communication and relationships.

A note to self!

Coping with life one day at a time

Writing Bug

The price of wisdom often comes at loss of our naivety ,our innocence, the trust in life and people. I do miss my old self sometimes, but I am more happier and at peace with my current self.
I was so upset at myself for long, for being so naive , so innocent that I actually called myself stupid when I took people at their face value : the face , the emotions , and the concerns they showed me and not the ones they really had.
I still do it though and I must admit I am still learning to cope up with the hurt I do get time to time, but that’s the part of me , of who I am, I trust people easily. Some of them put their trust back , others didn’t, some even use it.
I have learnt that what others do is definitely not my problem , I am only responsible to manage myself to safeguard my heart ,to preserve my sanity. I have stopped reading between the lines. I have stopped analyzing what others actually meant when they threw a taunt, a frown at me or purposefully ignore me to make me feel unimportant.
All this affected me in past, gave me anxiety and nervousness but not anymore.
I still trust people, I still go out of my way to help people, I still am genuinely happy for others, I will forever keep motivating people in spite of any of their behavior that affected me in past or present.
I have entrusted all my actions to Almighty that whatever good I do is for his sake only and not for any human being. I still get hurt but intensity is much less now.
How do you deal with it , would love to know your coping mechanism ?

Are you Over Sensitive ? Do you Over think ?

  • Do you often cry while watching those melodramas on TV or  any heartbreaking movies? and actually feel that pain and grief  for many days.
  • Too pic1sensitive for your eyes,skin, ?
  • Sensitive to light and sound , crowd overwhelms you?
  • Often feel anxiety and get worried over small little things,?
  • Get hurt by others easily with their words , even sometimes with their looks  or faces they make? Don’t like jokes /mean humor where people make fun of someone or a situation?
  • Over analyze everything ? Sense the vibes ?
  • Take too much time in making decisions ?
  • Often nervous or feel depressed easily ?
  • Feel alone and left out and at same time need your time alone when always surrounded with people ?

Did I just described you completely ,

How do I know so much about you ? Well, It is no magic, these are basic signs or symptoms of HSP(Highly sensitive people) /SPS(Sensory Processing Sensitivity ) as the psychologists have termed it,( you can google the terms to know more )  good news is ,  It is not a disorder or a problem , this is the just the way you are , to be technically  more correct we are(well I just described  myself above) , born naturally, innately so don’t be shy or feel awkward when some one tells you next time :you are too sensitive or chill yar ! just joking ! You are over reacting!

Why I am writing this post : We often do not know ourselves completely or the reason behind our behavior, Sometimes we are trying to control our certain reactions but if we don’t know why things affect us, how can we fix it ? We need to be at peace with ourselves first and accept the way we are!

What is special about sensitive people :

Being a highly sensitive person ,you have a your own perspective to see the world, which is often different from the rest , you are looking for depth in life and in your relationships , you are too sensible and caring for needs of others ,which in itself makes you a special person .

The happiness of others pleases you and their pain affect you in same way as it has happened to you, it helps you to feel what others feel and you use your imagination to walk in their shoes.It helps you to keep grounded and be kind .

You look for real content in life since superficial things do not attract you, and are working constantly to make your life more meaningful,  There is a quest of knowledge and peace that makes you stronger in your will power and to face the problems. People often tell you  that you are a strong person but in reality only you know how much you cry  , People often look up to you for solutions and advice.

Isn’t it a lot of good things already ! Already feeling good ? That’s what I wanted to do,  make you feel good about yourself! You need to work on your strengths and reduce the impact of weaknesses!

How can you minimize the impact:

  • There will always be things affecting you , you will be hurt by incidents or people around you  , but you need to learn to bounce back quickly.
  • Stay positive , surround yourself with positive people and cut down those negative thoughts.
  • Keep praying  as it keeps you connected to Allah . He puts that strength in our hearts and refill our energy reservoirs, ask for His guidance and strength .
  • Do not keep everything to yourself when you feel hurt or low, talk to Allah in sujood , talk to people who are equally sensitive like you, I am sure we all have  those few special friends which match our emotional and sensitivity quotient.

P.S : I do not always  write about Hijab, I only write what is on my mind , so stop being judgmental 😉